The Schism, part 1

Karl: The time has come. I must claim what is rightfully mine. His Divine Presence: YES, INDEED. YOUR'S IS A GLORIOUS EXISTENCE WORTHY OF PRAISE FROM ALL. His Divine Presence: ONLY YOU HAVE THE TRUE GLORY. ONLY YOU, WITH THE AWESOME VISAGE OF A THOUSAND ANGELS ARE WORTHY. ONLY WITH YOUR TREMENDOUS STATURE, UNPARALLELED IN ALL OF NATURE, CAN ONE REACH SO HIGH. ONLY ONE WITH YOUR IMMENSE INTELLECT COULD COMPREHEND SUCH NUANCE. ONLY THE VIRILITY OF YOUR FANTASTIC MANHOOD COULD INDUCE SUCH RAPTURE. ONLY YOU MAY CLAIM THIS MOST ULTIMATE PRIZE. Karl: And so, Dr. Cool, that's why I took the last cookie. Mike: Harumph. Jonathan: Grrr. Dr. Cool: Dr. Cool: Rockin' tale, my man. Hey-ho, Jonny-o. Break out your side of the dealio. Jonathan: Well... Disembodied Voice of Narration: To be continued... Mike: